Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Sorting out the chaos

Written on Nov. 1, 2007

I’ve had some internal randomness lately. The cause – I’m really not sure; could be a lot of things. I know I have not been spending enough time in the Word over the past week. Not real sure of the cause for that either; maybe no motivation, no direction? No excuse whatever the reason may be. I can’t really seem to concentrate on one thing and there’s really nothing that I’ve wanted to concentrate on.

I’ve found this new freedom in my relationship with Christ – one that is free from formulas and steps and just simply loves. Loves with liberty and loves with appreciation of even the smallest things that come from God. Seeing God at the center of everything has changed my perception of Him. Instead of trying so hard to keep Him first, keeping Him the center re-arranges all my other priorities and the way I see this life I’m living.

Seeing God in other people has changed the way I view my relationships. Instead of thinking I’m doing something wrong by talking to people I see the love that God has for me through them and enjoy the fellowship of learning about Him together. There should be no guilt in this life – convictions, but no guilt.

I’ve got that sense again that I’m on the brink of something huge. Usually when that happens it passes me as a whisper. Not because it turns out to be small, but because it is a natural part of the life God has planned for me. If it came at me like a rushing wind I might get blown away by the sheer idea of it and run. I’m aware of God’s presence in my life as He carries me through these huge plans He has for me. I have a strong stirring in my soul right now that He’s up to something great, and I’m honored to be a part of it. Being blown away by God Himself is truly a beautiful chaos.

No comments: